Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Randomize
