Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
