I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Randomize
