I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
