dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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