yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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