Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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