Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
