There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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