Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
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