I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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