xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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