I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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