I'd wear matching sweaters with you
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Randomize
