The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
