Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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