Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize