Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
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