Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
