Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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