goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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