so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
