why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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