You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
