Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Dear god my vagina.
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