i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
The police scanner is talking about you again....
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize