there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
