Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
