hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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