Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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