butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize