i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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