Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize