I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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