it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize