She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
