so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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