I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
So much rum. So many feels.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I want a musical about memes.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
