why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
