so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
worst night to have a conscience
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
i think my cat just said my name.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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