dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize