come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
