"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
