You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
