If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize