remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
