i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
