chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
