he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
you win again, gameday.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
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