evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Shame - the story of my life.
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