god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
