Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
She has the best kind of daddy issues
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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